Yuck.

Jane is one of the few ‘mainstream’ magazines that I regularly pick up and read – mostly because it’s full of tidbits and interviews that don’t annoy me. The product reviews are usually quite decent, I like the “Makeunder” section, and generally enjoy reading the articles. It’s not ideal – after all, there can only be one Bitch and one Bust – but Jane‘ll do in a pinch.

Flipping through the September issue of Jane this morning, I came across the usual assortment of folded pages containing perfume samples – the sort where you open the fold and can sniff the product, or rub it on your wrists or tuck it into your lingerie drawer or whatever the hell people normally do with them. (Me, I try not to breathe deeply while flipping past. Heh.)

Among the various pages was an ad that featured a white-fluffy-dress-clad woman posing in a half-yoga, half-seductive pose on a shimmery, watery surface. There was no product identifier – and the text read, “Beguile your senses. Succumb to the freshness.” I flipped the page and discovered it was an ad for Tampax “fresh” – which is apparently, “the new cardboard tampon with a light clean scent”. Of course, I pried open the page and sniffed. Perfumey-powdery-ick.

I have issues with this ad. Several, in fact.

1. “The new cardboard tampon” – umm, please tell me you mean “cardboard applicator” and not cardboard TAMPON.
2. There is no smell from your period until the blood hits the air. There is no reason to scent tampons – once they’re removed, they’re disposed of. Most people I know don’t wave them around in the air before they flush/dispose of ‘em.
3. Why do we need to convince women – of any age – that their cooter should be scented like anything OTHER than cooter?

Grr.