Bad Parenting.

We take bets on which kid will cry first in certain circumstances. Like, say, when we leave the house to run an errand together as a pack.

No, really, we do.

We don’t do it NEAR the kids, of course, and we certainly don’t high-five each other when we win by guessing the right kid.

But it makes the whole “breakdown in the middle of the store” thing so much easier when we’re stifling giggles.

I mention this because tonight we’re having stirfy for dinner.

Stirfry means a LOT of vegetables, of course, and everyone knows that the only vegetables our kids will eat are those named CORN or POTATO or SPAGHETTI SAUCE WITH NO CHUNKS OR LUMPS IN IT, EW, EW, I THINK THAT’S AN ONION AND NOW I’M GOING TO CRY BECAUSE YOU’RE CLEARLY TRYING TO KILL ME.

*ahem*

I have been missing vegetables for a while now – other than corn and ‘taters, I mean, which aren’t really vegetables so much as sugar in vegetable format – and Coffee is anxiously anticipating tonight’s meal, too.

This can only mean that one of the kids will be in hysterics within 20 seconds of the food reaching the table.

I have yet to hear who Coffee is betting will cry first, but I’m putting every penny on Oldest One.

  1. Sylvain’s avatar

    I’l take that bet. I say middle one.

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  2. happykat’s avatar

    oh…fill us in!

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  3. violet’s avatar

    It was Little One – but for reasons completely unrelated to the vegetables!

    We had our usual rule in effect – eat a full serving of the “main course” and you’re eligible for dessert – and the only one who made it was Oldest One.

    The other two were fine with missing dessert which suggests less that they’re totally offended by the vegetables and more that they wanted to exert their power over the situation. That’s a-okay, btw, since they ate other foods and had the option of the peanut butter and jelly sammich for dinner, too.

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  4. Sylvain’s avatar

    Same thing happens if I bet on Sports.

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  5. Lynn’s avatar

    Nice that they have choices. You really do so much about parenting. I’d love a list of the books you read to prepare for this sudden parenthood sthick.

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  6. R.’s avatar

    When we go over to the family’s to eat I always make it a habit to get a heaping bowl of veggies/salad and go “MMMmmmm Veggies!” The kids always momentarily flush a light shade of green.

    Odd. The only veggies I recall having problems with as a kid were lima beans.

    Non-sequitur : “I’ll have the soup or salad please.” Heh. That still cracks me up.

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  7. Flippy’s avatar

    Damn, I love veggies…except for lima beans. However, I didn’t cry a single time at the table because we were having lima beans, I just swallowed them whole…like pills. ;)

    I hope that eventually the boys will like everything. It’s too bad more kids can’t grow up like my nephews, eating in good Las Vegas buffets. They’ve always been encourage to try anything, and with it being so easy (and not getting in trouble when they decide they don’t like something – because the meal costs the same whether they eat only salad or only chicken or only dessert), they’ve grown up into awesome eaters. All of them, for instance, love sushi…unlike their fathers who grew up in a place without gigantic buffets and are still super picky. My mom ended up with two good eaters and two boring eaters. Although, I was happy to see my big brother eat raw broccoli dipped in ranch dressing at his Super Bowl party. Perhaps he’ll eat just about anything if he can dip it in ranch dressing. :)

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  8. Flippy’s avatar

    Ugh, I wish you had editing. I didn’t proof the above post and I’m super tired…and it shows. Damn.

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  9. Nicholina’s avatar

    My 6 year old was/still is in some ways just like this when he first moved in. Onions=poison. He was only familiar with bananas for fruit and corn or canned green beans in casseroles for veggies.

    He’s expanded his eating quite a bit in the little over a year he’s been living with us. Just this weekend he scarfed down a soup full of veggies, including the dreaded onion and green stuff (kale), even. Yay!

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