July 2009

1. Despite torrential rain, dark skies and high winds (and the loss of hydro) I have not been totally terrified during the storms today.
2. There are now Soft Paws on Miss Isadore Von Fluffypants’ claws. Pretty!
3. Dogs, sprawled on the floor, looking like part of a crime scene. Except for the snoring.
4. The way the Canadian Border Guards often say “Welcome Home!” when they let you enter the country after being in the U.S. I haven’t been across the border in a bit, but it just occurred to me while reading this post.
5. It may be late on Sunday afternoon, but it’s still the weeeeeeeekend!

1. Weeeeeeeeeeeekend! Weekend! WEEKEND! Yay!
2. Diet Coke. THAT’S RIGHT. I AM DRINKING SOME RIGHT NOW. (Only some of you will know why that’s worth a declaration.)
3. Tetris!
4. Time to read, alone, while the boys went to watch the new Harry Potter movie.
5. Lovely cool weather. I don’t care that it’s not “summery” – it’s wonderful.

My Swedish grandmother is now rolling in her grave at my failure to remember anything but the most rudimentary and/or nonsense Swedish, but apparently someone at the Katt Forum.se (Sanna?) has linked to me and so I feel obligated to say Hej!

Shall I regale you with what little Swedish I do remember?

Of course! I never miss an opportunity to embarrass myself Internationally!

Hur mår du?
Jag mår bra!

Jag skulle vilja haen kopp kaffe!

I min gröna Galosch!

Jag har en hund.

Jag tror fisken är död.

Skit!

.. I’ll understand if you don’t return because you think my fish declaration is crazy. But, still, it was nice to get a few more hits from outside North America to the old blog. :)

Middle One had a very good time at camp by all indications.

He is tanned and he is tired and he made crafts and he swam in the lake and he laughed a lot and he (along with most of his fellow campers) absolutely forgot to change his underpants for 4 days (ohgod) and he’s totally, TOTALLY looking forward to next year.

I am so relieved I could cry.

My lavender plants are going absolutely crazy lately – they’re a luscious purple and they’re huge and they’re very, very pretty.

They are also putting off the most delicious lavender scent – strongly enough that the fan in the window – at least 20 feet from the plants – is blowing it directly at me as I sit here in the living room.

I feel so relaaaaaaaaaaxed..

Coffee and Oldest One left home at 6pm and headed to the middle of nowhere to pick up Middle One from Cub Camp.

The camp flyer noted that pick up was at 7:45 but that there was a “family campfire” at 6:45 for anyone who wanted to participate.

Maymo was disappointed that he couldn’t go (his bedtime is 8pm, he was barfy yesterday, and the boys won’t be back ’til around 8:45) but he agreed to stay home. I agreed to make grilled cheese sandwiches for his dinner.

Not-so-secretly, I was kind of glad that I wouldn’t have to sit on a soggy wet stump of wood and get smoke in my eyes. This is why I’d suck at single-parenting: in the face of a bonfire and singing, I’d have left the kid there and made him find his own way home.

After eating, and chatting for a bit about filling the house up with bananas and exactly how hilarious that would be (plenty, according to Maymo) I sent my small friend upstairs to brush his teeth and get his jammas on.

I quickly checked my email.

6:58pm: Text from: Coffee
No bon fire. Skits. :(

7:07pm: Text from: Coffee
Please kill me.

I think I hurt myself laughing. Seriously.

I complained to my doctor several months ago that my PCOS was getting out of hand – again. The medication I had been taking gave me a crappy side effect and I discontinued it, and the symptoms were all back in full force, so I wanted something else.

He made vague rumblings and then I pointed out that I’m pretty much growing a goatee over here and ISN’T IT PRETTY? He very quickly told me he’d refer me to a specialist.

A week or so later, the message on my machine informed me that I had an appointment with an obstetrician which.. temporarily stunned me. While PCOS certainly has an impact on fertility, I’m not even remotely concerned with that side of things and more concerned with the general health of my innards and out..erds.

I called the obstetricians office and asked whether it was an appropriate referral. She first assured me that the doctor also did general gynecology, then checked my chart and said I had been referred for “pelvic pain” — and that was the next surprise. I don’t have pelvic pain. I have ovaries with little grape-like cysts all over them!

My confusion must have been apparent as she waited a moment then said, “Well, whatever it is, you can see the doctor in July.” I mentioned the PCOS. She said she’d make a note of it. All good.

After a quick online search of the doctor’s name, I found a bunch of reviews. Many of his patients were mighty peevish about the fact that they had to “wait for hours” for him to arrive – he was frequently late. As Coffee and I agreed, that whole “lateness” thing seemed reasonable given that he was DELIVERING BABIES. You’d think a pregnant person would be a bit more understanding of that, wouldn’t you?

Fast forward to yesterday which found me sitting in the waiting area of an office marked “OBSTETRICS” and decorated with pictures of babies, posters of babies, pamphlets about babies and information about babies.

I was glad that I brought a stack of library books. I do not wish to partake in the babies, thank you.

The doctor was an hour late to see me, which was better than multiple hours, and I had a lovely time checking out my fellow waiting room companions. Lots of pregnant women. One miserable looking husband. One woman in handcuffs, accompanied by a corrections officer.

Boy howdy did I ever want to ask HER what she was “in for”. I didn’t. The officer looked.. unfriendly and I didn’t want to end up in handcuffs on the floor at an obstetrician’s office. (“Mommy got arrested at the lady-parts doctor!”)

I got into the office, removed my pants when the nurse told me to (but I left my socks on because I refuse to remove them for this sort of appointment) (seriously, I refuse) and hopped up on the table to wait. There are not many occasions in life when you get to sit half-naked in someone’s office so I tried to relish it. No dice.

The doctor walked in, peeked at my chart, then shoved his hand in my cooter (!), pushed on my gut to feel my ovaries and then declared that he needed to do some blood work and he’d see me in September.

Um, wait, what?

I asked him what his thoughts were on PCOS – since, y’know, that’s why I was there and all – and he said he likes to treat it with birth control pills. I told him that my body doesn’t like those – in the slightest – and that they make me unpleasant to be around. Even for me. Especially for me. I can’t think over the sound of my weeping.

He then said his second choice is spironolactone – the drug I had a negative reaction to. I don’t want to die! I don’t want to die!

He frowned, then made a vague reference to “something else” which I am hoping is unlimited chocolate and a pony and a fancy party hat that I wear all the time. Somehow I suspect it’ll be something less enjoyable.

I left the office a few minutes later, clutching a blood requisition form and an appointment card for the end of August (I actually whimpered to the receptionist about how I’ll be in school full-time when September rolls around so could we please, please, just ignore what the doctor said? PLEASE?!)

In the meantime, I intend to start braiding my goatee and decorating it with beads and taunting Oldest One with how much awesome facial hair I have compared to him. I think he’ll like that, don’t you?

While out running errands today, I stopped by Value Village and found a box of Colorforms. I loved them when I was about Maymo’s age, so I figured he might enjoy spending some time creating weird scenes with vinyl blobs.

I was right and he did enjoy it. Great use of $0.99, quite frankly.

As it turns out, though, Oldest One enjoyed them MORE. Poor Maymo had to keep asking him to pleeeeeeeeease let him have another piece to make his picture. Please? Pleeeeeeeeease?

1. I’ve been rather productive this morning!
2. It’s Friday!! !! !!! !!!!
3. Curry for dinner last night. I can still smell it in the kitchen. Nom.
4. Maymo has stopped barfing and feels fine today. (Let’s sum up yesterday by saying that I’m not ‘good’ with bodily fluids spewing out of someone’s face.)
5. The sound of said 5 year old upstairs, playing cars.

1. My obstetrician appointment went well this morning. (It was for my PCOS, not for any other reason – the guy is also a gynecologist but mostly does obstetrics and so there are no signs about gynecology and, eh, whatever. It went well.)
2. Wheat berry salad. Nom.
3. The stubbornness of a 5 year old is awesome to observe. (See Wheat Berry Salad, above.)
4. Bendy straws!
5. The kitten, “hunting” on the window ledge – tail twitching, ears back – and being thwarted by the window screen,. She is displeased.