Not How She Appears.

Sometimes I forget that, with my purple hair and mostly-black wardrobe, I look a little weird to people. And, along with that, sometimes I forget that people make assumptions based on appearances.

I recently worked an afternoon shift that involved another staff member. There are a few shifts at this particular group home that require two staff to work together; generally, one takes consumers for appointments or runs errands while the other stays in the house to make sure everything is running smoothly.

This other staff member and I had previously only said “hello” to each other during team meetings. I knew her name, and vice versa, but we didn’t know anything about each other. As we spent some time talking, however, it became quite clear that she had formed some opinions of me. I kept ‘surprising’ her with things like being in school and adopting kids and being married.

She later admitted that I wasn’t “at all” like she expected.

You’d probably (not) be surprised how often I hear that.

Sadly, no one ever wants to tell me what they expected. I realize that’s because their perception was probably leaning toward negative – and it’s hard to turn to someone and say, “I just figured you were a ne’er-do-well who snorts coke off of hooker’s asses on the weekends.”

It sorta’ makes me want to take that up.